Wonkette⁠92%

Cocktober Comes Earlier Every Year. Tabs, Fri., July 31, 2026 ⁠74%

By Rebecca Schoenkopf⁠87%

7/31/2026, 4:00:59 AM

BS Summary: This article contains 32 faulty reasoning types, including Negativity Bias, Politically Left Leaning Bias, and Hasty Generalization, with Biased Writer Voice as the most egregious example at 52.1% saturation with 366 hits. Analysis detected 2,017 faulty-reasoning hits from 703 analyzed words, generating a BS Score of 58.7% and a BS Rank of ⁠74% (7,446 of 28,109 articles). This article is worse (more manipulative) than 73.50% of the article peer group.

Tabs gif by your friend Martini Glambassador! 
Three days starting with a Nice Time! 
Now those are some poll numbers how you say in the shitter. 
(The New Republic) 
Hooo, at link is a GREAT picture of (pic isn’t there any longer, but he was SO GRR MAD IN IT) Todd Blanche, whose attorney general nomination Trump is considering pulling because even the Republicans (or at least the ones Trump threw into the cornfield) won’t vote for the guy who promised the J6ers one BILLION dollars. 
(New York Times) 
Rockin’ roadkill with RFK Jr. 
(Some fucking cooking show page ugh gross) 
Wonkette needs you to keep us going, IF you are able! 
The button below will take any amount of your choosing, one-time or monthly, at Paypal, or we have a Patreon too. 
Venmo Wonkette all the $$! 
Trump’s trying to grift up your science. 
I mean, he already broke it, but he’s trying to do that special thing he does. 
(Lisa Needham at Public Notice) 
Fifteen years for Colin Gray, the dad who was told by local cops “hey looks like y’all got a buddin’ school shooter here,” paraphrase, so he went and bought him an AR-15. 
What the fuck is wrong with all y’all, no paraphrase. 
(ABC News) 
Mandela Barnes has dropped out of the Wisconsin gov race, and if this story is correct, it seems he was … single and slutty? 
Is that really all? 
No milkshake duck, just bein’ young and hot and a lieutenant governor and chicks accepted to bone him? 
Damn. 
Anyway, Francesca Hong seems cool. 
(NOTUS) 
And St. 
Paul MN Mayor Kaohly Her, it sounds like your sense of humor is super terrible, like eh uh whut? 
And I say that as somebody who dated one subordinate and then married a second one, all of this sounds worse as you read on, what you doing man. 
(MPR) 
V. 
Marx Demon Hunter still hunting demons and running for Colorado gov! 
(9 News) 
My goodness, that’s a big tax cut for Montana corporations and millionaires while everybody else’s property taxes went up 40 percent, yowch! 
(Monica Tranel) 
G. 
Elliott Morris talks to Wisconsin Democratic Party chair Ben Wikler — who most Democrats are probably regretting about now they didn’t vote in to chair the DNC BUT ALSO I’m not mad at the current DNC chair Ken Martin for doing a Fifty State Strat either — about how to unfuck democracy should we get the (very shortlived) chance to in 2028. 
It’s a podcast, but you can click ‘transcript’ up top. 
(Morris) 
Gosh I hope Republicans’ really disgusting gerrymandering and Supreme Court Voting Rights Act-killing don’t backfire on them with Southern voters of the less- Pantone Color of the Year persuasion. 
(The Guardian) 
All of Europe to boycott FIFA World Cup for real if they sell a big fat stake to Jared Kushner’s vulture fund brother. 
Is this why FIFA’s been up Trump’s ass? 
All for a little bit of money? 
Well I just don’t understand it. 
(ESPN) 
Where is the country of Africa and can Marco Rubio’s State Department get it 100 percent wrong? 
Bless the rains. 
(The Guardian) 
What are y’all watching with ZiggyWiggy for Wonkette Movie Night this Saturday night at 9 p.m. 
Eastern? 
Dark Passage , available for free with ads on Tubi and Plex; $3.99 in the usual places. 
Free on OKRU . 
So hop to! 
WONKMEETS AHOY. 
CLEVELAND (Sat., Aug. 8, 1-3 p.m., at Boss Dog Brewing Company, 2179 Lee Rd, Cleveland Heights, OH 44118), PITTSBURGH (Sun., Aug. 9, 2-5 p.m., location still TBD), SAN FRANCISCO IN HONOR OF FUKUI (Fri., Aug. 
21, Hyatt Regency SF [Embarcadero]), WINDSOR, MASS (camp near but not at Paul and Holly’s, Labor Day weekend)! 
Atlanta has been postponed. 
TIME TO PARTY! 
We really do need you to send Wonkette to all your friends! 
Bookshop.org is the anti-Amazon, a certified B-corp partnering with local bookstores. 
Here’s our Bookshop affiliate link, when you buy books, Wonkette gets 10 percent. 
You can search any old book from that page and it will count. 
Buy all the books! 
I will never stop using all the different colored texts, I LOVE THEM! 
Article reasoning-pattern comparisonThis article: 0.0%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.5%Wonkette: 5.2%Confirmation Bias0.0%This article: 0.0%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.0%Wonkette: 0.2%Anchoring Bias0.0%This article: 9.2%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 1.4%Wonkette: 2.0%Availability Heuristic9.2%This article: 3.4%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.3%Wonkette: 0.6%Representativeness Heuristic3.4%This article: 2.3%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.6%Wonkette: 0.6%Hindsight Bias2.3%This article: 0.0%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.0%Wonkette: 1.4%Overconfidence Bias0.0%This article: 3.4%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 1.4%Wonkette: 3.8%Framing Effect3.4%This article: 5.1%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.8%Wonkette: 0.5%Loss Aversion5.1%This article: 0.0%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.3%Wonkette: 0.4%Status Quo Bias0.0%This article: 0.0%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.0%Wonkette: 0.0%Sunk Cost Effect0.0%This article: 1.8%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 1.2%Wonkette: 0.8%Optimism Bias1.8%This article: 5.1%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 2.2%Wonkette: 1.4%Pessimism Bias5.1%This article: 47.4%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 17.6%Wonkette: 15.6%Negativity Bias47.4%This article: 4.1%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 1.9%Wonkette: 0.9%Self-Serving Bias4.1%This article: 12.7%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 2.3%Wonkette: 2.0%Fundamental Attribution Error12.7%This article: 0.0%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.2%Wonkette: 0.1%Actor-Observer Bias0.0%This article: 0.0%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 2.3%Wonkette: 1.3%In-Group Bias0.0%This article: 0.0%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 1.3%Wonkette: 2.6%Out-Group Homogeneity Bias0.0%This article: 0.7%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 1.2%Wonkette: 0.5%Halo Effect0.7%This article: 0.0%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 2.8%Wonkette: 1.3%Horn Effect0.0%This article: 0.0%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.0%Wonkette: 0.1%Dunning-Kruger Effect0.0%This article: 0.6%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.6%Wonkette: 0.8%Recency Bias0.6%This article: 0.7%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.8%Wonkette: 0.3%Primacy Effect0.7%This article: 0.0%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.0%Wonkette: 0.1%Blind-Spot Bias0.0%This article: 10.5%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 5.8%Wonkette: 12.1%Ad Hominem10.5%This article: 0.0%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.1%Wonkette: 2.6%Straw Man0.0%This article: 0.0%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.0%Wonkette: 1.4%Appeal to Authority0.0%This article: 1.6%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.6%Wonkette: 1.0%False Dilemma1.6%This article: 12.1%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 1.7%Wonkette: 1.1%Slippery Slope12.1%This article: 8.8%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 1.0%Wonkette: 0.2%Circular Reasoning8.8%This article: 14.9%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 7.0%Wonkette: 7.9%Hasty Generalization14.9%This article: 0.0%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.1%Wonkette: 0.5%Red Herring0.0%This article: 0.6%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.3%Wonkette: 0.4%Bandwagon0.6%This article: 5.0%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 6.0%Wonkette: 6.7%Appeal to Emotion5.0%This article: 0.0%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.6%Wonkette: 0.6%Begging the Question0.0%This article: 9.8%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 1.4%Wonkette: 1.6%Post Hoc (False Cause)9.8%This article: 0.0%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.3%Wonkette: 0.3%Tu Quoque0.0%This article: 0.0%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.3%Wonkette: 0.7%Burden of Proof0.0%This article: 1.6%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.3%Wonkette: 0.1%Appeal to Nature1.6%This article: 0.0%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.0%Wonkette: 0.1%Composition/Division0.0%This article: 14.8%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 2.6%Wonkette: 2.0%Anecdotal14.8%This article: 0.0%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.0%Wonkette: 0.1%No True Scotsman0.0%This article: 2.3%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.6%Wonkette: 1.0%Ambiguity (Equivocation)2.3%This article: 0.0%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.0%Wonkette: 0.0%Gambler’s Fallacy0.0%This article: 0.0%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.0%Wonkette: 0.0%Middle Ground0.0%This article: 0.9%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.1%Wonkette: 0.1%Personal Incredulity0.9%This article: 0.0%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.3%Wonkette: 0.2%Special Pleading0.0%This article: 0.0%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.0%Wonkette: 0.4%Genetic Fallacy0.0%This article: 12.7%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 1.3%Wonkette: 1.8%Unattributed Quote12.7%This article: 1.0%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.1%Wonkette: 0.8%Quote-first Misdirection1.0%This article: 52.1%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 32.6%Wonkette: 30.3%Biased Writer Voice52.1%This article: 2.1%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 1.4%Wonkette: 2.1%Indoctrination2.1%This article: 19.5%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 10.3%Wonkette: 10.0%Politically Left Leaning Bias19.5%This article: 5.7%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 0.5%Wonkette: 0.4%Politically Right Leaning Bias5.7%This article: 14.5%Rebecca Schoenkopf: 12.1%Wonkette: 3.5%Attempt to Sell a Product or S…14.5%

703 words analyzed.

Speakers

11speakers3.6%attributed speech678writer words
0%flagged-word coverage
5 attributed words20% of attributed speech85% writer coverage
0%27.5%55.0%Biased Writer Voice-54.0 ptsWriter: 54.0%Lisa Needham at Public Notice: 0.0%0.0%Politically Left Leaning B-20.2 ptsWriter: 20.2%Lisa Needham at Public Notice: 0.0%0.0%Attempt to Sell a Product -15.0 ptsWriter: 15.0%Lisa Needham at Public Notice: 0.0%0.0%Unattributed Quote-13.1 ptsWriter: 13.1%Lisa Needham at Public Notice: 0.0%0.0%Politically Right Leaning -5.9 ptsWriter: 5.9%Lisa Needham at Public Notice: 0.0%0.0%Indoctrination-2.2 ptsWriter: 2.2%Lisa Needham at Public Notice: 0.0%0.0%Quote-first Misdirection-1.0 ptsWriter: 1.0%Lisa Needham at Public Notice: 0.0%0.0%

Attribution is sentence-level. Pattern percentages are calculated only from words assigned to that voice.

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Analysis

Hover over highlighted words in the article to view the associated bias or fallacy analysis.